Thoughts

I love this little person. But man, has she ever changed my life. I guess babies are notorious for doing just that.

For instance, right now, this very second, she's sitting on the kitchen table watching Cole eat his lunch. Now she's trying to put her hat in his food. He's telling her "That's a no-no." Of course, she just leaned in to give him a kiss, so I guess he can't complain too much. :)

The kids have started eating at the bar to keep away from her. She's trying to figure out how to get on the bar stools, but that may take a while. Hopefully, anyway.

Last night I was reflecting on these changes and whether or not I'm appreciating this time with her or just recognizing how much harder things are now. And I thought about a talk that President Monson gave last year (he's the president of our church). Some of the things he said in his talk really resonated with me:

This is our one and only chance at mortal life—here and now. The longer we live, the greater is our realization that it is brief. Opportunities come, and then they are gone. I believe that among the greatest lessons we are to learn in this short sojourn upon the earth are lessons that help us distinguish between what is important and what is not. I plead with you not to let those most important things pass you by as you plan for that illusive and non-existent future when you will have time to do all that you want to do. Instead, find joy in the journey—now.

What great wisdom. He goes on to mention what I'm dealing with specifically:

If you are still in the process of raising children, be aware that the tiny fingerprints that show up on almost every newly cleaned surface, the toys scattered about the house, the piles and piles of laundry to be tackled will disappear all too soon and that you will—to your surprise—miss them profoundly.

I need to print these passages out and stick them on my fridge. I know how much I miss my little boys. I don't want to go back and raise them all over again, but when I look at pictures of them, my heart aches to be with them again. And I wonder if I did everything I could for them. I need to keep that perspective with them now and with Kira.

Hopefully I can do that today. And I'll worry about tomorrow tomorrow.